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49. Values and Triangles 4/6/04
I met with dear friends Michael and Melissa Cook for dinner and Michael and I touched on many subjects, but time only allowed for so much exchange. Michael then sent me this e-mail below, that I am reprinting with his consent, so we can discuss some interesting ideas and findings that influence our growth.
~~~~~
Harmon
I wanted to follow up on our
conversation last night about how you can do
anything you want, but fear is a stumbling block. This is a key discussion
point for Tony Robbins, and he has some great insights in this area. What
I've learned from him is the following: we all have what he calls "Towards
Values", and "Away From Values"; things we want to get or experience and
hence move towards, and things we want to avoid, and hence move away from.
I.E. Things we desire, and things we fear or hate. For many people
problems arise because:
1) They are not conscious of exactly what's on these two lists.
2) They didn't consciously create the two lists in the first place - they
evolved through growing up etc.
3) The VALUES ON THE TWO LISTS ARE NOT ALIGNED. I.E. there are
inconsistencies. For example, a person's top Towards Value might be
"ADVENTURE", but they might have an important Away From Value of "Feeling
Insecure". This person is going to have problems!
We focused a lot on this in our trip to the Bahamas, and spent a couple
of days actually discerning our current values, then updating them
consciously, in the light of our current being. The idea is "Don't just
make a living - DESIGN A LIFE". It was very interesting. One big change
that occurred for me was that "HEALTH AND VITALITY" emerged as a very
important Towards Value for me, whereas in my whole life it has never been
high on the list. Mental Health has been high on the list, but I've not
focused on physical health. But I changed that in the Bahamas.
Anyway, summarizing what I think is very interesting about this for you is
the notion that "ALIGNMENT" is a wider concept than "just physical". The
genius of your work - and Monica's of course - is that by working directly
on the body you bypass all the intellectual and emotional defense
mechanisms that people use to protect their current value system, which is
creating pain in their lives. And then of course with mindfulness
techniques you encourage people to let go of the ideas that are limiting
them.
But I don't think "Emotional Alignment" follows automatically from
alignment of the body -
Here's a tool Robbins uses to understand our "State". He calls it "The
Triad". Every state - and it would be interesting to correlate this with
the Abhidhamma - it certainly correlates with certain monastic Christian
traditions - every state has 3 aspects:
PHYSIOLOGY - breath, posture, muscle tone, pulse, pH of the blood, amount
of food in your body, etc.
FOCUS - what are you focusing on?
LANGUAGE - what are you saying to yourself?
Physiology is the most important dominating aspect, then Focus, then
Language. But they are all important. And if you want to change your
state, these are the things you must change. How fast? In a heartbeat. HOW
FAST?
To deal with FOCUS, he talks a lot about WHAT QUESTIONS ARE YOU ASKING
YOURSELF? Very interesting, because when you think about what questions
are going through your mind, you can always replace them with a better
question. For example, "What's wrong with me?" is obviously not very
empowering - and the thing about the brain is, whatever question you ask
it, it will come up with an answer! So it will give you an endless list of
what's wrong with you if you ask it to. A better question would be: "What
can I do, right now, to make progress in this situation, or improve it,
and enjoy the process at the same time?" The brain will give you answers
to that too! Handy little gizmo!
To deal with LANGUAGE, he recommends the use of what he calls
INCANTATIONS. I have found these very helpful recently, specifically I
have been using:
"All I need is within me now." This is a powerful way of affirming that
"The kingdom is within."
But of course for years I have used: "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have
mercy on me!" which has gotten me through a lot! And given me a lot of
grace! And taught me 90% of everything I know about the Gospel.
So an interesting form of ALIGNMENT would also be the alignment of these
three aspects of our state. If somebody is doing your breathing exercise,
standing on the outside of their feet, etc., but they're saying to
themselves: "This is bullshit, I can't wait till it's over", obviously
they're not going to get the full benefit!
I didn't expect this note to be so long - but I'm glad to share some of
what I've been learning from the Robbins seminars.
Michael
Posted by Harmon at April 6, 2004
Comments
Michael
Thank you for this series of useful tools for further honing our internal ‘state’. These precepts of PHYSIOLOGY -- FOCUS -- LANGUAGE, I'm sure, are part and parcel of the ITP, (Integral Transformative Practice) that Michael Murphy is activating on the West coast.
M.C.) “Anyway, summarizing
what I think is very interesting about this for you is
the notion that "ALIGNMENT" is a wider concept than "just physical".
H.H.) I agree that alignment
can be used as a wider concept then ‘just physical’. We might even say there are
three areas to the subject of Alignment.
1. Physical
2. Emotional
3. Spiritual
M.C.) “But I don't think
"Emotional Alignment" follows automatically from
alignment of the body –“
H.H.) Again, I will agree in part that emotional alignment does not automatically follow because a person has done some physical alignment work. I have to say that this really has to be looked at on a case by case basis. A lot depends on what one brings to the experience of working with physical alignment.
It has been said that if one works any point of the triangle presented above, as represented by 1, 2 and 3 of the triangle, they will affect the other points. At the same time the information and practices of the triangle are constantly being upgraded or evolved so that transcendence becomes more obvious.
I have worked with many people who could be considered emotionally challenged and I feel that in working with the body something gentler transpires in them and change occurs both in the external and the internal spaces of the physical and emotional.
M.C.) “Here's a tool Robbins uses to understand our "State". He calls it "The
Triad". Every state - and it would be interesting to correlate this with
the Abhidhamma - it certainly correlates with certain monastic Christian
traditions - every state has 3 aspects:”
H.H.) Ken Wilber writes extensively of States and Stages along with the many factors that form a complexity of developmental areas that can be viewed and strengthened, such as morals and ethics, to name a few of the value lines or potentials.
The Abhidhamma Pitaka or Higher Doctrine deals with the content of our moment to moment thought possibilities and how the refining of thought (by studying the wisdom traditions, Ken Wilber and practicing dharma) leads to more refined experiences were genuine joy and happiness reside. Also, a lot of laughter.
Finally in presenting Alignment of the physical form we get direct evidence that can be seen and felt. The internal evidence is more theoretical and subjective, so evidence comes slower but, can be seen in the many modalities that we work with. Suffice it say that working in the physical with the structure, that houses the emotional and spiritual parts of our three in one nature, the trip up the road to remembering ones self can become less of a chore.
Peace
Posted by: Harmon on April 6, 2004
Hi Harmon- Thanks for the dialogue with Michael. I found the question of whether emotional alignment occurs along with alignment of the physical to be interesting. I certainly have had the experience of working with alignment of the body and the Mind, Spirit and Body align simultaneously. Alignment of the physical seems to me be an excellent mindfulness practice, to wake up to where and when the emotional or mental is out of sync with the present moment of the body. Thanks again, Jivita
Posted by: Susan Rochmis on April 6, 2004
Hi Harmony! As I am just learning about alignment and the mental, spiritual and physical components that go along with alignment, I must say that I have been awakened to all that is within and around me. I do believe that by doing the "physical" alignment it makes me want to grow in a mental and spiritual way as well. I see more clearly each and every moment of every day and I thank you and your wisdom and knowledge for this!!! Thank you, Marla
Posted by: Marla Edwards on April 8, 2004
Marla
Thank you for your kind remarks. I wish you well in your continued exploration of the breath and body. It is my pleasure watching you evolve.
Love
Posted by: Harmon on April 9, 2004
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